Monday, September 27, 2004

Donkeys, Chocolates and Shoes

Mood: same ol same ol Playing: Anything by The Calling

In I, Robot, there was a scene where Will Smith called someone an 'Asshole'.

Ilham turned to us and asked, "What's an Asshole?"
After the 'fucking' experience, we were ready.
"It's not a nice word. Don't say it to anybody, okay? People wont like it." Taufik answered.
"Okay" he said.

Later during dinner he asked again.
"What is Ass?"
"How do you spell that?" I asked back, hoping that he had mispronounced A.S.K.
"a. s. s." he said.
Taufik looked at me.
Then I remembered Shrek 2 and how Puss in Boots told Donkey that he still looked like an ass after drinking the happily ever after potion.
"An Ass is a donkey" I said
"oh, so it's donkey hole?" We knew he was referring to 'asshole'. Oh man... after 3 hours, he still hasnt got his mind off the word??? Okay let's tackle this head on.
"Ilham, sometimes bad people say bad words. But you're a good boy, right? You don't want to say bad words" Taufik started.
"You won't like people calling you a donkey, would you? So you don't ever call another person a donkey" I added.
Ilham agreed.
I reminded myself to check my mouth and not use that word while I'm driving the asshole-filled streets of KL.

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I have 4 chocolate nuggets tied up with a ribbon in a bundle of netting on my dresser. I got it as a party favor when I went to a wedding a few weeks ago. I didnt want the kids to eat it (coz they already finished eating theirs at the wedding) so I had put it on the dresser when I got home.
Ihsan was getting dressed this morning when he saw the bundle. He had tried putting on his father's deodorant on his armpit but he kept giggling coz it tickles. He saw the chocolates when he was putting the deodorant back on the dresser.

"I see chocolates! Whose chocolates are that?" he asked.
"It's mine" I answered with a straight face.
"Oh, you're going to eat it?" he said while he pulled up his underpants.
"No. Not now. Later. Please put on your pants"
"Oh you're gonna give it to your friend?"
I gave a non-commital "Hm" and a "put on your octopus t-shirt".
Ihsan continued getting dressed.

Later while he was combing his hair in front of the mirror and I was putting on my scarf, he said
"Bonda, if your friend gets into her car, and then an anaconda who has been hiding in her car suddenly comes out and eats her.."
I gave him a shocked look. He was calmly combing his hair, looking at his own reflection and didnt look at me.
".. can I have the chocolates?"
I tried not to laugh.
"okay, if that happens, you can have the chocolates" I said and patted his bum.

And he smiled and said a triumphant "yes!"

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Anis didnt put on her shoes when I picked her up from school yesterday. So her shoes were on the floor of the car when we got home. She had left her shoes there and I had left the door open so that she can go get it.
She went straight to the sofa and laid down, sucking on her bottle.
"Anis, have you taken your shoes out of the car?"
She shakes her head. suck suck.
"Anis, do you want to take your shoes yourself or do you want me to follow you?"
She shakes her head. suck suck.
"You want to take it yourself?"
She shakes her head. suck suck.
"You want me to follow you?"
She shakes her head. suck suck. and turns her attention to the TV.
"Ilham, switch off the TV. We will not watch TV until Anis takes her shoes out of the car and puts it on the shoe rack"
Ilham switches off the TV and groans "Oh man.... !Anissss!!!"
Anis shakes her head. suck suck.
"Okay, fine. No TV until u take your shoes" I said.
"Anis!!!" everybody whines.
Anis starts to cry from all the pressure.
I went upstairs to change and when I got back down, Anis was off the sofa.
I could hear her weeping outside.
I went out and saw her retrieve her shoes and walk around the car.
When she saw me she cried louder.
I said "Good Girl! Thankyou...", ruffled her hair and wiped her tears.
She put the shoes on the shoe rack, went in and headed for the TV. She put her finger on the 'ON' button and looked at me. "Blayh?" she asked. It's her version of "Boleh?" or "Can I?".
I said OK. and she pressed it.

She came and sat on my lap while we laughed at Clifford the Big Red Dog.

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