wonked up words

Ilham

We had some friends over for dinner the other day. They were moving back home after a year here. We were talking about how their kids cannot speak Bahasa Malaysia anymore. So we asked Ilham to try and say something in Malay.
He hesitantly said , "urm.. Saya.. urm.. minum.. air" (I drink water).
The other kids giggled.
"You drink wadder?" they laughed at Ilham.
"War-Ter lah!" said our friend, poking fun at his boys' american accent.
We were quite proud that Ilham could still speak malay.
When it was time to go home, Ilham sidled up to me and asked "How do you say 'Hope you have a great time going back to Malaysia' in Malay?"
I was stumped. So I told him to say 'Selamat Jalan' (Safe Journey) instead.
Ilham quickly yelled "urm Sur-lum-mutt Jull-larn!!!"
"Sur-lum-mutt Jull-larn??" "Sur-lum-mutt Jull-larn????" I chided him.
"What are you? Mat salleh jaga estate ker?? Suh-Lah-mutt Jah-lun lah...."

Ihsan

We were at the dining table, when Ihsan suddenly remember a question he wanted to ask his dad. (I don't know why, Ihsan would suddenly have alot of things to talk about when there's a plate of rice in front of him. This would usually distract him from eating his rice, though).
Ihsan asked Taufik "Ayah, did you use a shovel?"
Taufik gave him a quizical look, "A shovel?? Use a shovel for what? The garden?"
"No, for your face" Ihsan explained, "You know.. for your whiskers"
"Ohhhhh!!!" we all went.. "You mean, a SHAVER. not a shovel"
Ihsan slapped his head for dramatic effect, "I ferrgottt!!!"

Anis

Once Anis came up to me right after she was nagged for messing up the living room and asked me, "Are you marry?"
I corrected her, "You mean, am I married? Yes, I am married to ayah".
"No.." she said, obviously annoyed, "are you marry me?"
"You mean, can I marry you? no I can't marry you.. you're my daughter"
"no, bonda!!! Are. You. Marry. Me???" she insisted.
"What anis??? I don't understand you lahhhh" I answered tiredly.
"are you marry me because I mess up this room?" she finally said.
And I finally got it.
"You mean ANGRY. You're asking me if I'm angry at you?"
"Yes! Bonda marah?" she asked.
"Not anymore" I laughed.
I finally figured it out. Marah+angry=marry.

So a few days later I heard her brothers teasing her. They would annoy her and I'd hear her say something in an angry tone to her brothers.
The boys would go, "Anis, are you marry??"
and she'd say "Yes!"
and they'd egg her on "Are you married to Abang Ihsan?"
and she'd say "Yes!"
and the boys would have a big laugh.
Poor Anis.


aiyahhh how lah like this??