About a year ago when Ilham and Ihsan became old enough to do chores, I decided to put up a Star Chart as a reward (thus motivation) system to encourage them to complete their chores. Each chore that is completed well (keyword: 'well') will be rewarded with a star, that could be converted into money that could be spent on anything they want, be it books, toys, trinkets on our travels and what not.
For disobedience (i.e. not listening to me, disrespecting, hitting), I used the naughty-spot/time-out method.
As three of them got older, I think they have outgrown the naughty-spot method, so to keep their behaviour in check especially during the school holidays when tension runs high and opportunities for conflict is aplenty, I have decided to introduce the Good Behaviour Chart.
left: Star Chart, right: Behaviour Chart (click for a bigger image)
Each of them gets an initial 10 points on their chart (Because I believe that they are essentially good). For each bad behaviour (Starting a fight, hitting, not listening/ignoring instructions, screaming, etc), one point will be crossed out. The person(s) with the most good behaviour points at the end of the week will get a reward: They get to choose where we eat during the weekend.
We have only been using it for a week plus, and last week Ihsan chose to eat Roti Telur at Madina Restaurant. This week so far, nobody has gotten their points crossed out yet, but it's only Sunday so we'll see.
I think so far so good. My kids have started to think twice before they do anything, and it only takes a "Do you want a point off?" from me to keep them in check.
Oh man.. now that I've written that all down, I think I sound like some military matron...
*hangs head in shame*
i like reading post such as this, ideas for better parenting, cool!:D
ReplyDeletefor drivers in doceland pun ade cm gini,my husband dh byk points kena tolak,so kena gantung lesen sebulan huhu..myb the next time hes speeding i shud say "do u want a point off?" hehe
Absolutely Not!
ReplyDeleteIf you notice I have a school chart, per sticker for each non crying school days. It works.
Now it has progress to money since hes learning simple arithmetic and seemingly needing more "knick knacks" than entitled per month
Beats screaming our lungs out.
a creative way to educate your child..
ReplyDeletetapi its a bit difficult when you have a kid who would say 'biar je la.. tak kisah pun'.. pening kepala.. heheh.. (my case la tu..)
makcik haundem - wehhh lama tak dengar cerita. How are you lah? Ini inspired from that RTD system tu lah :)
ReplyDeleteSwahili - you betcha. Also beats giving them allowance for nothing. At least now they appreciate every single riyal they get.
SHould I also post this in bondablab or not?
Neeza - If one kid says "tak kesah", encourage the other siblings to excel, and then watch if that one starts to care or not! Make sibling rivalry work for you :)
Tried this last year, but I used points for good behaviour, which means they start from zero. Bad behaviour minus the points u already earned. It did work and they are more rajin to complete their tasks but then comes in the tak kisah attitude from Syafiq...he will said I have enough money in my tabung dgn eksyen nya!(sama mcm neeza) Tension!! Maybe I shld start again using yr method, to see yr point being canceled is more sakit hati kan... ;0-
ReplyDeleteI had this system in school (not in Malaysia) but we would not be rewarded with money but more like sundaes :P I think money works better at home, or when it stops working ,something that kid really wants (within a price range)
ReplyDeleteHey your style sure beats the old school caning :) I plan to do the "stand ( or sit) in the corner facing the wall" thing as well as opposed to hitting. I might consider butt-smacking though..it's hard for me coming from a "spare the rod, spoil the child" upbringing..haha
wow ! and the kids listen ?
ReplyDeletei shall use this when lesha's old enough too ! good idea :)